I Lied To Myself

[00:00:00] Dr. Antonio Gurule: What’s up guys? Welcome back to another episode of the Live Loud Life podcast. My name is Antonio, your host of the Live Loud Life podcast. Uh, I just wanna say, first of all, thank you for being here. Thank you for falling along on our journey. I hope that this information has been both informational, uh, and motivational to you, to helping you along your journey.

[00:00:17] Um, we don’t have, we don’t have a lot of housekeeping, A lot of, uh, a lot of introductory short talk. Be sure though to check out, uh, our website if you have not liveloudlife.com. We have a number of just different blog posts, resources out there that really just kind of expand upon the conversation that we provide here on the podcast.

[00:00:37] Uh, that being said, Our Instagram handle is @live.loud.life, and, uh, that’s a lot more of just short form content that, uh, you can take in little bite size. Uh, we talk, obviously our focus is families, right? And we do have a, a strong love for helping prenatal, postnatal population. And the, and the families and the kids along with that.

[00:01:01] Creating Generational Health
[00:01:01] Dr. Antonio Gurule: But we can’t forget about the dads. We can’t forget about the grandparents, um, and everybody else that’s involved in that family because what we’re trying to create here is generational health, right? The wisdom and knowledge around what healthy living is and how to live long, healthy life. That’s generational, right?

[00:01:19] It starts with grandparents passing down to parents, passing it down to their kids on and so forth. You can break the stigma or habits. That might be in, involved in your family and set, set your fu future generations up to live better, to live louder, to live longer. And that’s really what our focus is. So we obviously hit that in a number of different avenues and facets.

[00:01:46] Uh, while we are not specialists in everything, we try to bring specialists on to talk about certain topics. Uh, but what we, what we really focus on a lot of, Excuse me. It’s a lot of movement based stuff, right? Uh, having a background as personal trainers and strength conditioning coaches and mo mobility coaches, we help a lot with.

[00:02:07] Like, Hey, you’re in pain. And pain is a big de deter for motivation and momentum, right? So how can we help you in this, in Trump to continue on? And then from there, as you’re, as you, as you’re gaining momentum and rolling forward and living and living loud and living your life, How can we polish the edges?

[00:02:22] How can we take some information to maybe expand upon that? And that’s kind of the, that’s kind of the, the, the segue into what I wanna talk about today.

[00:02:34] How I’ve been Lying to Myself
[00:02:34] Dr. Antonio Gurule: Today’s today’s show topic is, I lied, I’ve lied to myself, I’ve been lying to myself. And that then creates a slippery slope of, of what I’m actually able.

[00:02:50] To produce what I’m able to or how I feel about certain things, um, you know, so on and so forth. So I’m gonna dive a little bit more into obviously what that means so that we can clarify that and why I am sharing this. So I hope you enjoy the show.

[00:03:15] All right. So lied. As I was stating, I’ve, I’ve been lying to myself. Now, this is where things I think get very interesting in the role of social media and. Individuals not, I wouldn’t wanna say finding validation, right? But oftentimes when we get stuck or something like that, we’re finding we’re, we’re reaching out, we’re looking for motivation, we’re looking for inspiration, we’re looking for ideas, we’re looking for information about others that have maybe been down this journey or this path before to figure out maybe how to get unstuck or, or get back on path.

[00:03:52] Um, or just a complete change. Like, let’s say I’m, I’m stuck with, uh, I don’t wanna be here anymore and I wanna be over there. And this is, this goes for any. Facet of life, um, finances, um, of career, um, how your, your, your body and your health, right. So this is not unanimous to just any one of those, those things.

[00:04:14] And, and, and I think that’s really important because we can’t do this on our own. And if there is someone who’s done it before you, they’ve obviously forged a path and understand that. So it’s good. Uh, they, as they say, success leaves trails, right, uh, of following the breadcrumbs of information to determine what’s best.

[00:04:35] But the hardest thing is then when you are doing it right, when you’re doing it as being honest with yourself about, um, more or less the efforts putting in, because you can’t really judge, You can’t really judge the results, right? Judging the results. Is is only a byproduct of the efforts put in. That’s just what it is.

[00:05:01] There are obviously extenuating circumstances that could change the results, but even then it’s like, what are you gonna do about it? Right? You can’t go back and change that. So it’s either then prepping yourself better for those random circumstances that might come up. Right. Or just forging forward again, and this is where I have not been honest with myself.

[00:05:26] There is, and, and I do, I do understand grace. I do understand forgiveness. I do understand, um, you know, reflection of giving credit. And, and, and, and being proud and, and excited of what we have accomplished. And I, and I am like, our life is wonderful. Um, you know, I, I am, I am extremely, extremely grateful for the opportunities that we’ve had, not only for our business, uh, my for my education, being in a, being in a place, uh, within the world and in the United States where, where that is and could be possible.

[00:06:04] Um, you know, being able to. Uh, being able to raise a family, being able to buy a house, I am extremely grateful for where we are. And it is one of those things, like, this is a funny thought. I, I honestly go back and forth. I go back and forth between, I. Watching and listening to inspirational, motivational type.

[00:06:30] I, I really enjoy doing that stuff. And it’s, uh, it, it is just something that, you know, motivates you and charges you. And, and I, and I love doing that. And I go through these waves and forms, right? But then on the flip side, I’m, I’ve been digging country music lately. I so funny growing up. I mean, my dad listened to like old school kind of country.

[00:06:50] And then I didn’t really listen to it too much, but now I honestly feel like the, the other side of that is like, there’s so much a part of me that’s like, You know, what do you need in life? Die a happy man. Family, food, roof over your house, type of thing, right? And there’s, So I’ve like, okay, on this side I’m getting amped.

[00:07:11] I’m, I’m psyched. I’m ready for that next level. I’m ready to do this, this, or this. And then like, sometimes I’m just like, Hey, I just wanna. I just wanna, I just wanna sit on the back porch and, and, and do X, y, and z and there’s a time and a place for both of those. And I think that’s what’s important of understanding where you’re giving your time and attention and, and carving out the time and attention to be able to get that other side out of it.

[00:07:33] Cuz it can’t be just go, go, go, go, go, go, go.

[00:07:39] It can’t , it can’t just be go, go, go, go, go. Um, and there are some people like that, God bless our souls, who can just, just rev and grind and just hit it hard all the time. And, but, but when you start getting, when things start kind of getting washed out, Right things, Things will start to get washed out when you’re not taking a consistent audit and being honest about the effort.

[00:08:01] Clearly Defining Goals to Drive Efforts
[00:08:01] Dr. Antonio Gurule: So when I’m talking about this, Go, go, go, go, go, go. It’s, this is, uh, let me rephrase this. It’s not Go, go, go. It’s, it’s being. Uh, specific, it’s being intentional, it’s being direct, it’s being clear about goals, aspirations, next level, whatever it might be, right? Because that helps you define the efforts that when you put in, and this is where again, I have struggled the most, is maybe not defining things as as clear, um, uh, which would be super helpful in certain facets, right?

[00:08:30] But being honest about the efforts I’ve been putting in, because when you start mixing all this stuff, you can’t do everything at once. There’s a great book called The One Thing, and that’s what’s so hard about being a business owner, a. Relatively young. So I mean, we’re not, we’re over the five year hump, but we’re not heading the 10 year hump.

[00:08:47] Uh, but having a family and having this, all this stuff is, you can’t do all the things. And when you try to start doing all the things, your efforts start getting diminished, um, in any one of those things. And then the effort, or sorry, the output and the results start to start to start to drop. And that’s just how it is.

[00:09:04] And, and yet then I say, you’re doing, you know, you’re doing good, you’re working hard, but I’m confusing. Oftentimes movement with moment or sorry, movement with actual progress. And that’s, that’s a harder thing to measure all the time, cuz the day in and day out grind, you’re not gonna see daily progress.

[00:09:20] It’s about being consistent and being honest about the consistency of the efforts that you’re putting. Right, And, and that’s what I encourage you guys to look back and audit in your life in different areas of life. Have you, if you’ve ever heard of the wellness wheel, right? You have some of examples and there’s different, there’s different.

[00:09:41] There’s different ones out there, right? But you have like business relationships, spirituality, health, um, uh, health, a subset or a different one. Could be like even like nutrition or something like that. But you start to look in, there’s like, and each one of those, there’s like really being honest with yourself and not lying.

[00:10:00] How, how, What are the efforts like grade yourself. If you wanna put a scale of one to 10, abc who cares? It doesn’t really matter, but grade yourself. Not where they stand necessarily, but uh, what I’m gonna start doing is grade myself on the ef the actual honest to god true effort that I’m putting in and the effort sometimes, like this is an example that’s hard to sometimes major, that right.

[00:10:28] But think about, this is like for the most part, for nutrition, it’s the effort of what you’re not obviously consuming, right? Most of us know we should be getting easier or more fruits, veggies, whole foods, meats on and so forth. But that takes more time and effort. So it’s a lot easier to just grab the bar to do this, right?

[00:10:49] It’s a lot easier to say, Hey, I’m a little tired. I’m gonna take, I’m gonna take my work out a little easier today. When in reality, It should. Its, I don’t wanna say that’s the lack of motivation, but we’re not doing anything that actually makes us that tired. Like we should be able to kind of dig deep and push ourselves a little bit.

[00:11:08] And, and this does, you know, we’re not confusing physiology. We obviously know the need for sleep. And this, there’s a, there’s a whole nother conversation that has, that has to be had around recovery, obviously. But I think so many of us we’re just, we’re just, we’re. Beat down to a certain degree from having all these other things that we need to do, and we’re just feeling too scattered.

[00:11:29] So having pen and paper, notebook, um, uh, uh, computer, whatever that is, and just trying to just start, start writing down and being more clear about those things and trying to find the patterns of, okay, I wanna need to allocate more time here. I need less of this. And in reality, when you start doing this, when you really just take a few minutes and start doing this, It all, it opens up pretty, pretty clearly, right?

[00:11:55] Releasing in Order to Move Forward
[00:11:55] Dr. Antonio Gurule: We, we tend to know the things that we need to stop giving so much time and effort towards, or maybe need to be a little bit more efficient towards, so on and so forth. And I always think about this. I was raised, uh, as I was growing up, I was Catholic. If any of you ever heard of Lent before, most people know what Lent is.

[00:12:12] But you give something up. Um, for Lent and, uh, it’s supposed to be a sacrifice. And more recently, I was thinking about this from a, from a, just a habitual thing, right? Obviously I have these, these goals and these accomplishments that I wanna hit in a number of different areas. and then I was just thinking, well, oftentimes we think about, well, what do I need to do in order to get to that, to get to those goals, to reach that marker, or whatever that is.

[00:12:46] And then, uh, it started then reflecting as well, what more than, what do I need to do? What do I need to let go of? What do I need to release? Because there are a number of things that are not aiding me or helping me actually get to those goals. And this was partially a reflection we had. Um, Uh, we were at a conference this past, this past weekend and, uh, one of the keynote speakers was essentially reflecting on, on the 80 20 rule, right?

[00:13:14] So the 80 20 rule, for those of you don’t know, is essentially that 80% of your results comes from 20% of your efforts, right? So if we were to break this down, Uh, let’s say, let’s say for instance, business wise, right? We do a lot of marketing and advertising, right? 80% of the revenue brought in from patients or whatever that is, comes from 20% of really what those marketing efforts are.

[00:13:43] So the goal is you gotta determine what that is so that you can double down and triple down or focus on that, right? But that, but it’s interesting, 80%. The, the 80% of our efforts only result only gives us 20% of our role results. Right? So it’s really. It’s, it, they, so it goes both ways, right? I need to understand what things I need to stop doing, but then the things that are working, that’s where you need to feed forward and in, and, and it’s a, it’s, it’s, it’s different for everything.

[00:14:10] It’s a constant reevaluation audit, as we had already indicated to, to figure out what those things are, because they’ll, they’ll change. Still change, like markets change as a result to business, right? Uh, seasons of life change. When you’re talking about, you know, if you get a, you have another kid, or you know, you move or works crazy, like how do you, how do you keep getting the results that you want, uh, uh, and making sure that you’re putting enough time and effort in the right.

[00:14:38] The right input, the, the 20% as opposed to putting more time and energy into the, to the 80%. So that’s been more of a reflection that I’m going through is not lying to myself and being honest. What are the 80 per, what’s the 80% that I’m still doing? That’s only, that’s only giving me 20% of my results.

[00:14:53] Cuz that’s the, that’s the fat that I need to trim off. And get rid of, and then that can focus on everything else. Right. And and most of us know, like when I was thinking about this, I knew right off the bat a few things that came to mind that, that, that just, just was, it’s not helpful, It’s not wrong, it’s not wrong, but it’s just not, it’s not like it was bad and it was creating negative results, like going backwards.

[00:15:17] It just was not helpful in the overall goal. And really, as you think about it, it’s kind of like, it’s, it’s, it’s slowing you down if you want to get to X, Y, and z. If you’re focusing or you’re doing too much of the 80% that’s only yielding 20% of the results, you’re just dragging dead weight. And there might be a time and effort where, a time and place where that might come back around and be advantageous.

[00:15:37] Return on Efforts May Include Support
[00:15:37] Dr. Antonio Gurule: But that’s what we’re trying to like dive in. And that’s why I’m such a big fan of, especially if we’re busy, we’re all busy. But, uh, I would call bang for your buck, right? When we’re talking about like movements, right? That’s why I’m so biased towards, um, things that, uh, have great impact with the littlest amount of E right?

[00:16:01] And for me, that’s kettlebells. Um, there’s, um, For me, it’s kettlebells. I think they’re, they’re great. They elicit, um, strength components if used appropriately. They obviously offer a lot of metabolic conditioning and cardiovascular training. Um, they can be utilized very effectively for mobility, training and stability as well.

[00:16:21] There are certain avenues that are, that you are missing out on it, but I think that’s one of the best bang for your buck, 20% that elicits a lot of the 80% or the results that most people are looking for. That’s a fantastic choice. That’s a little bit of a sidebar for this, but all in all, we gotta stop lying to ourselves, right?

[00:16:41] Creating a little bit more honesty. I, I don’t want you to beat yourself up, right? But it’s just, it’s just having an honest. An honest to God truthful reflection about where we are in certain things, and, sorry, more importantly, not where we are is the efforts that we’re putting towards that. If you’re not where you wanna be in some avenue of your life.

[00:17:05] Reflect back on the efforts that you’ve actually been putting through there. Now, if you feel honest and truthfully that you have been putting in as much effort as you possibly can, well, there’s ways to accelerate that, right? We have catalysts, uh, Support groups, coaching probably the easiest, Right?

[00:17:25] Mentors, whatever that might be. Someone that can help you figure out like maybe we’re just blind to the 80 20 role and we’re not quite sure. Right? And someone else can come in and be like, This is, this is the issue right there. So sometimes you just need a little bit of extra help to help you break through.

[00:17:42] But more times than not, you get a ton out of just doing this self reflection and audit and figuring out what to trim out. So hopefully this was helpful for you guys. Um, I’m gonna, this is, this is the transition and the change that I, again, this I’m just sharing my journey and what I’m gonna be focusing on, um, in this, this third quarter, sorry, fourth quarter.

[00:18:02] I’m 2022. Um, getting into 2023 and just kind of really prepping what this next year looks like as we’re winding down 2022, wrapping up a few projects, but then looking forward in a six months, one year, kind of three year point in time and, and doing some, um, some. Uh, some back, back casting to figure out what I actually need to focus my time and tension on and what I need to take my time and tension away from.

[00:18:34] So until next time, guys, live loud.